These Scars
by alwayswright2284
Summary: One shot. On the way to the Park Ziva needs some reassurance and Tony is there for her. Sometimes even though you already know how someone feels about you it's nice to hear it said out loud.


**These Scars**

_This is the first thing I've written in a while (years actually) so I'm sorry if I'm a little rusty. Kinda just wanted to see if I still could. If this has already been done then I'm sorry but this scene was stuck in my head. It's also WAY more emotional than I normally like but oh well I guess. Thanks for reading!_

_Disclaimer: I have no affiliation to NCIS and no claim on the concept or characters._

"Ziva it's like 1000 degrees outside. You can't wear a sweater to the Park!" Tony rolled his eyes in exasperation, blocking her in his front hallway with his body. They were using one of their rare days off to relax and walk in the park; so far they hadn't made it past the foyer.

"Tony, do not be such a mother chicken! I will be fine; you do not have to worry." She made another move towards his front door. A sharp tug on her sleeve stopped her.

"First, it's mother hen. And I'm not joking it's brutal out there. Record highs they said in the forecast this morning. When you pass out, and you will mark my words." He was working himself into a full scale Tony Dinozzo tirade. "I'm not taking you to the hospital! I'm pretty sure 911 calls still count against the minutes in my cell plan. And you know how I feel about hospitals! The waiting, the paperwork, all those snooty doctors, not to mention the smell…"

He stopped suddenly noticing the abrupt change in her demeanor. Her face was carefully blank and her eyes focused over the top of his left shoulder.

"Hey." His tone softened, and he brought his hand to her chin forcing her to meet his eyes. "What's wrong Zi?"

Her chin wobbled as she shook her head.

"Nothing, Tony." He just waited. Finally she rolled her eyes and started again, She knew better than to think he would give this up.

"My scars Tony." She sounded like she barely got it out, and there was a long pause before Tony let out a sigh.

"I'm sorry Zi. I didn't think." She instantly felt bad for the guilt in his eyes. "Still though Ziva it's too hot out for this, you'll get sick."

She swallowed hard. "I can not get used to the way people look at me. The way they stare and look away when I catch them. At least the children do not have pity in their eyes." She gave a bitter laugh. "But they are still curious and I have to remind myself their questions are innocent."

They were chest to chest his hand still holding her chin. She took another deep breath; he hated the tears welling in her eyes.

"It is just easier to keep them covered than deal with the constant reminder." She finally broke eye contact as she shook his hand away. In all his life he didn't think he had ever felt the way he felt right now.

Ziva wrapped both arms around her middle as if she were holding herself together. He grabbed her shoulders, almost roughly just to keep contact. He knew if he didn't she would find away to end the conversation. Trying to get her to talk out her memories in the safety of her home had been like pulling teeth. Several times she had broken off mid-sentence only to almost run to her room, get in bed and pull the covers over her head.

"Zi, if I could change what happened I would. You don't deserve this constant reminder of what happened. I know it doesn't exactly help you deal. Ziva, you have to accept this is real, these scars are NEVER going away. But you shouldn't have to hide them, you should never have to make yourself uncomfortable, never have to inconvenience yourself because of what other people think! Those scars are proof of how strong you are, you lived through hell! Those scars tell how brave you are; because you could have given up, you could have taken the easy way out and let yourself die in that desert, you didn't. You chose to fight and to live. That's bravery like I've never seen before."

He pulled her into his chest and wrapped his arms around her. Ziva buried her face in his shoulder and he could feel her body shuddering as she finally started to cry.

"Next time you feel like someone is judging you, you call me, so I can tell you what **I** see when I look at you. I'll tell you how beautiful you are, how smart, how strong, how capable you are. I'll tell you how much I love your heart, your loyalty, your spirit. I know that you know it's all true because you can see it in my face every time I look at you."

After that they were silent for a long time, still standing together, Tony's arms around Ziva. By the time Ziva pulled her head up to once again look Tony in the eye quite some time had passed and the shadows had shifted significantly.

"Thank you Tony." She smiled. "You're the only one, the ONLY ONE who knows how to make my bad days instantly better, make me smile while I'm crying, you make me feel…" She stopped to search for the best word to describe what she felt. "Alive."

Again long minutes passed.

"Also why is a mother chicken not the same as your mother hen?"


End file.
